Navigating your baby’s sleep journey can be overwhelming. In this guide, we break down newborn, infant and toddler sleep so you can tackle sleep challenges with confidence.

You probably heard it over and over again while you were waiting for your new arrival: “Get your sleep now because after, you won’t sleep for years.” Or maybe older relatives imparted the oft-mentioned, “One piece of advice—sleep when the baby sleeps.” But here’s the deal: No one really tells you what to expect at each stage and how you can handle sleep challenges along the way. Off-hand remarks and old wives’ tales are fine for chit-chat, but they’re ultimately not helpful when your little one is wide awake at 2am.

That’s why we thought we should we’d break it down for you. Keep reading for the goods on newborn sleep, how to set up a snooze routine for your infant, and finally how to handle the challenges of toddler sleep.

Newborn Sleep: The First Few Weeks

We’re going to be honest with you: All bets are off for the first month or so. There’s no point in trying to establish a routine because babies this young aren’t capable of consistency. It’s all about feeding and snoozing, but not on any sort of schedule. The good news is that new babies spend a lot of time sleeping (up to 19 hours a day). The bad news is, it’s usually fragmented and interrupted by the need to eat every two to four hours.

The other major issue newborns often have is that their days and nights are mixed up, because they have an underdeveloped circadian rhythm. They also experience shorter sleep cycles—around 50 minutes, as opposed to about 90 minutes in adults (sleep cycles usually lengthen as kids grow). This means they’re more prone to frequent waking.

This can be a challenging time for new parents, but there are things you can do to ease the exhaustion. Take turns getting up with the baby, if you can, so the other partner gets a longer stretch of uninterrupted sleep. Book a friend or family member to come over once or twice a week to look after your little one while you get a solid nap. You can also help babies flip their days and nights by making sure you (safely!) expose them to sunlight during the day. Go for walks during wakeful periods, so they get fresh air and sunshine at the correct time.

Infant Sleep: Building a Routine

Between two months and a year, your baby’s sleep habits will evolve. They’ll eventually sleep less during the day, but overall sleep needs remain high—typically between 14 and 16 hours a day.

Before six months old, wakeful periods will be a bit longer but not by much; most sleep coaches recommend short wake windows for babies this age, from about one to three hours, before going down for a nap. This means infants usually have three (sometimes four) naps a day. This may seem counterintuitive because you want babies to sleep at night and you worry they won’t be tired, but as many experts say, “Sleep begets sleep.” Good daytime sleep often leads to better nights.

If you’re unsure about the timing of wake versus sleep windows, it’s a good idea to pay attention to your child’s sleep cues. They may rub their eyes, yawn or start to fuss, which is usually a precursor to becoming overtired. An overtired infant or toddler is that much more difficult to get to sleep.

When you do get your baby to sleep in the evening, you can usually expect that they will sleep for 10 to 12 hours. This is a breeze for some infants and a major hurdle for others. Some parents may elect to try one of various sleep training methods, in an effort to teach their child to fall asleep on their own and stay asleep overnight.

Toddler Sleep: Remaining Consistent but Flexible

From one to three years, toddlers can typically handle awake windows that are between four and six hours long. They usually transition from three naps to two (a morning nap and an afternoon nap) around nine to 12 months, before dropping the morning nap around 15 to 18 months. Some kids may keep the morning nap until around age two—it’s really dependent on how well the child tolerates longer wakeful periods.

Once a toddler drops the morning nap, it’s common for parents or childcare providers to move the afternoon nap up in the day, so as not to end up with an overtired kiddo. The tricky thing about toddler sleep is that it can be unpredictable because kids this age are working toward developmental milestones every day. New stages can disrupt sleep, leading to more frequent nighttime wakings and an ever-increasing resistance to bedtime. Fortunately, most little ones are consistently sleeping 10 to 12 hours a night without waking by age three.

To avoid as much disturbance as possible, consistency is key. Establish a regular bedtime routine—things like bath time, storytime, soft music or white noise, etc.—to help your child wind down, and do your best to stick to it every night. It will take a few weeks to see a difference, but if you are dedicated to the routine, it will make bedtime and overnights that much easier.

We don’t have to tell you that sleep is vital for a child’s development, but we probably do have to inform you that no sleep stage lasts forever—good or bad. Babies and toddlers are known for throwing wild cards relatively often, so it’s important to keep your stress in check and remain adaptable when a routine or schedule needs adjusting. You’ll no doubt find your groove again quickly. And really, when you think about it, that’s kind of a good rule for parenting as a whole.