Making new friends can be hard when you become a mom. You’ll probably have more than a couple of awkward “first (play)dates” before you find the one who will totally get you and all of your crazy and become your mommy BFF. Once you find her, hang on, she will often be your lifeline and save your sanity while you’re in the mommy trenches together.

How do you know when you’ve found her?

1. You don’t need to clean your house before a playdate. Dishes still on the table from breakfast? Laundry piled everywhere (some of it’s probably dirty)? If you don’t feel the need to clean up or even apologize for your mess when your mom friend comes over, you’ve found your people!
2. She knows what to bring you from Starbuck’s without even asking. You’d do the same for her.
3. You can discipline each others’ kids and you’re cool with that.
4. You can talk about everything. You probably know all the gory details of each others’ birth stories, are very familiar with each others’ boobs, know all about diapering and potty training details of all of the kids, and are fully briefed on each others’ sex lives (or lack thereof).
5. You trade babysitting and you don’t keep track of who owes who anymore. She’s been up all night with the baby? You swing by to take her toddler to the park with your kids for a while so she can nap when the baby’s asleep. You’re desperate for a date night and your sitter cancels last-minute? She will totally come put your kids to bed and hold down your couch until you get home. You’re always there for each other.
6. You can carry on a conversation of interrupted thoughts and half finished sentences during a playdate and still feel like you understand each other completely.
7. You enjoy spending time with her without the kids. Nothing better than moms’ night out for a couple of drinks and a nice long (uninterrupted) chat!

Send this to your Mommy BFF!